Zombieing and how to deal with it

“Zombieing” refers to a dating or relationship phenomenon where someone who has previously ghosted or disappeared suddenly reappears in the person’s life. You may have been communicating intensely before or even gone out on some dates and all seemed to be going well, then “silence”. That’s called “Ghosting”. Sometimes though these ghosters come back to haunt you again, hence the word “Zombieing”; Ghosts coming back to life. They initiate communication as though they never left.

This behavior can be confusing and emotionally challenging for the person being ghosted. Here are some tips on how to deal with zombieing:

Assess Your Feelings: Take some time to reflect on how you feel about the person’s reappearance. Are you open to reconnecting, or do you have reservations?
Set Boundaries: If you choose to engage with the person who has zombie’d, set clear boundaries. Communicate your expectations and be assertive about what you are comfortable with moving forward.
Communicate Honestly: If you decide to respond, communicate honestly about how their previous disappearance affected you. Express your feelings and concerns.
Understand Their Intentions: Seek to understand the other person’s intentions for coming back into your life. Are they genuinely interested in reconnecting, or is there another motive behind their reappearance?
Evaluate the Relationship: Consider the history of your relationship and whether the person has demonstrated respect for your feelings. Evaluate if the relationship is worth revisiting or if it’s best to move forward.
Trust Your Instincts: Trust your instincts and intuition. If something feels off or if you’re not comfortable with the person’s reappearance, it’s okay to prioritize your own well-being and make decisions accordingly.
Establish Expectations: Clearly establish expectations for communication and behavior moving forward. Be transparent about what you need from the relationship and whether you are open to giving it another chance.
Protect Your Emotional Well-being: Prioritize your emotional well-being. Be mindful of how the person’s reappearance may impact your emotions and mental health. If it’s causing distress, consider whether continued communication is in your best interest.
Closure for Yourself: If responding to the zombie provides closure for yourself, even if you choose not to continue the relationship, consider asserting yourself and expressing your feelings. Closure can help you move on from the situation.
Decide on the Next Steps: Based on your assessment and communication, decide on the next steps. It may involve giving the person a chance to explain themselves or determining that it’s best to cut ties.

Remember that your well-being is the top priority, and you have the right to make decisions that align with your feelings and values. Whether you choose to give the relationship another chance or decide to move forward independently, the key is to prioritize your own needs and feelings in the process.